Dear Mister and Missus Landlord

 

Well, gosh...have I got a story for you. (Not really. My life is not terribly sensational. But I had a teachable moment, anyway.)

So, first, I have had this Zauerball Crazy yarn for probably eight years. I love it. I love to look at it, squeeze it, dream of what it could become, all of it. I recently started thinking, "You know what I need? old-school 1980's legwarmers!"

FYI:  nobody at all needs those. But in my defense, I have no thyroid, I have lost a lot of weight, and I work in a seventy-five year old building with a drafty set of windows. So there they are, below...I knit them in bed on many nights.

That said, I am part of a growing group - unofficially and with no charter or real name, for that matter - called Former Republicans Currently Without Party. The people I know of this ilk are generally money-minded white people, and before extremism literally took over politics, their determination of who gets their vote would be a balance between who handles money the best, and who handles people the best. As this rise of extremism has taken over the discourse, more and more of us can say with confidence that we want nothing to do with the "new" Republicans or the "new" Democrats. There is no party for the middle, and please read this sentence that follows as often as you need:

Neither Libertarians nor Andrew Yang is the answer to the bipartisan but directionless mush, currently swimming in our two-party system.

I have said that I will vote for Hunter Biden's Laptop before voting for Trump in 2024.

So, my story is actually a landlord story. Landlords have had a pretty brutal two years. All of the programs offered in housing were geared toward renters. Renters could apply for aid (but it was not required), landlords could not evict, and now that the eviction moratorium has expired, the eviction records from that time period have been sealed. Background checks have literally gone out the window.

I hate the word "Landlord." I use it because people use it to me, but it just sounds so English and misogynist. So, property owners were given relief, but the basis of the pandemic programs seemed to be that people who own property are rich, and people who rent property had no money in the bank. We were given a four-month forbearance option, meaning we could go up to four months without paying our mortgages, and then we would have to pay it all at once at the end of the time period or risk losing our homes.

My perspective on property investment has changed a bit in this time period. I have a six-flat in Westmont where I have a friend do background checks for me, but I am up-front with the prospective tenants. "Tell me what I am going to find," I say, "and I will take it into consideration."

First rule with this is if the person blames the former landlord for not fixing things, there is likely something going on with the tenant not paying their rent. Not to say there are no slumlords out there, but landlords do have an obligation to keep people safe, and that includes keeping their tenants safe. It is in their best interest to fix broken things, whether or not the tenant has paid. Landlords know this. So this is a red flag.

Second rule is that everyone has a past. See how things are being paid now, today, and not how things were paid seven years ago. Of course the past can indicate the future, but if you can't smell a bullshitter talking about their spending, and then you do a current-home visit (allowed by law in IL) and can't see the piles of hoarded or expensive crap and a sense that they need to be out before they are subpoenaed, then this is not the profession nor the hobby for you.

So yes, I do background checks. Yes, I verify income. Do I disqualify people for everything I used to? No. I do, however, try to imagine how someone would fit in one of the units inside a six-flat, as a member of a community with the other tenants. If someone gives me an indication that they "keep to themselves and never make noise," I am here to tell you that they start shit and always make noise. They do not belong in a building with five other groups of kids who currently do not have the money to buy their own place.

I got an instant message from a woman who said she was looking for an apartment, and I asked what her situation was. She told me she was recently divorced and looking to move with her 20-year-old kid, and that her condo complex now allowed Section 8 and it is not "safe" anymore.

I asked her where she lived now, where the complex allows Section 8. After all, I get asked on a regular basis about our complex, and Dupage County does not have many places where it is accepted. Maybe I could help someone down the road.

Her response was that she knows nothing about that (like, she doesn't know where she lives?), and that she is just stating that these low income people have also made the area low class.

My message back to her was plain and simple. "Then I'm sorry but I am not interested in renting my apartment to you. I wish you all of the fortune in your search!"

Well, what happened next was a bit of a surprise. Sorry to make this sound like clickbait, but, "WHAT HAPPENED NEXT WILL TRULY SURPRISE YOU! (click here)"

She replied that, no problem, but may she ask if she offended somehow? She is not on Section 8 and maybe could have explained herself better.

In other words, she tripled down on telling me that groups of Section 8 housing are low class.

She said that about a year ago, five of the buildings in her area started accepting Section 8 (mind you, I still do not know where she lives). She said the lifestyle and class of people have changed, meaning now that area can be unsafe at night, loud ruckus, and the police have to patrol the area. She told me she chooses not to reside with indigent people that don't work for a living and live off the state. Then she threw in her credit score, I guess as a hook in a really deep pond.

I took this as a teachable moment. Here is my response to whether she offended me somehow, word for word.

"Thanks for asking, Chris. Happy to explain. I have a sec 8 tenant in the city. She has been there for eleven years, and three hours before your message, the last thing she and I said to each other was "I love you." My six-flat in Westmont has a convicted felon, immigrants, people of color rebuilding after bankruptcy, someone who was screwed by their slum lord, a family of fast-food-chain managers, and a DREAMer. I feel strongly in getting a feeling for all tenants in the building getting along, so they can be their own mini- neighborhood-watch when crime occurs. I just feel if you think that all sec 8 voucher holders are trash, then you would not be compatible in the building, personality-wise. Is there anything I can do to help you in your apartment search?"

It should be noted that I made the decision to change how I ran my business after bringing someone in whose previous landlord filed eviction on her four days after she moved into my place. The bottom line is, you just have to get to know people.

The Republican in me would have taken her money because she has a good job and decent credit score. The Democrat in me did not like the fact that she hates a bunch of nameless, faceless people and felt that a police patrol is actually a bad thing. This is why I am without party.

Related: does anyone want to buy my house at 2251 N Laporte Ave in Chicago? It is a great starter home, a great investment if you wanted to rent it or rehab it to make it bigger (both the basement and attic can be expanded), or it is just a nice place to land if you feel you need a change.

We all need a change right now. I started with my outlook. Where will you start?

Roe Versus Women

Hello, everyone. I woke up angry and scared, which are two emotions I should not be feeling because of a leaked Supreme Court majority-opinion draft. 

Wait...this is a knitting blog. Stand by.

My good friend Allie Pleiter has published almost sixty titles for both Harlequin and Berkley, and her latest Riverbank Knitting Mystery series includes a knitting pattern inspired by a passage in the book. Her most recent title features a pattern I designed for her; I made a two-washcloth set inspired by the sister story in the book. Here is where you can buy the book:

Amazon.com: Knit or Dye Trying (A Riverbank Knitting Mystery): 9780593201800: Pleiter, Allie: Books

And here is where you can just buy the knitting pattern, if you prefer:

Ravelry: Sisters Washcloths pattern by Amy Kaspar

All proceeds from the knitting pattern go to AHIHA: Stan Mikita Hockey School for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing, a charity near and dear to my heart.

Okay...back to why I fired this up again. Politico reported on a leaked draft of a majority opinion which would overturn Roe v Wade.

Frankly, I do not care if you think abortion is murder. I do not care if you think life begins at conception. I don't even care if you think abortion should be allowed for absolutely any reason up to the point of birth. 

What I care about is that your opinion is not a doctor's opinion for his or her patient, and someone's privacy is being legislated.

I do not think abortion should be used as birth control. That said, how would I know if someone was doing that, since I have no right to know why someone walks into her doctor's office? At that point - at the point where a woman drives to her doctor's office and walks in the door - my opinion does not matter. A doctor may determine with his patient that an abortion as birth control is the right decision for that patient. I am not a doctor.

If I take my son to the pediatrician, it is nobody's business. For any reason. Including vaccines. Yes, public health should be legislated (I am looking at you, pandemic), but it is nobody's business when and how I get my kid innoculated from measles and whooping cough. I just have to do it so kids don't die 

If Roe v Wade gets overturned, I will not be able to do any of the following without the entire American public thinking it is their business:  get a mammogram, complain about hot sweats, get a vaginal ultrasound to verify my IUD is in the correct spot, discuss menstrual pain, inquire about a lump in my breast, inquire about a lump on my thyroid, inquire about a lump on my labia, complain of abdominal pain, ask about why I am gaining weight, or find out what can be done about my moodiness.

With the rise of extremist conservativism, I have distanced myself from the Republican party. I still believe in better management of money and more responsibility from each citizen, but I can no longer support a party that spent a generation and a half gaslighting people into believing the American Dream is not based in white supremacy. And in this case, for lack of a better term, male supremacy.

Let's take out the privacy piece for a second. There are two facts that have been proven, both by sociologists and by medical anthropologists who study what is done in other countries: restricting abortion kills women, and expanding women's health care saves almost three bucks for every dollar spent. I would think that, in a world where almost an extra million people in this country have died from a pandemic and the service industry is short-staffed because of it, protecting half of the population from more death would be a good idea. I also thought Republicans liked to manage money better than their leftist-counterparts. Well, when Colorado offered free birth control, their abortion rate plummeted by 80%. IUDs, if you are keeping score, are a bit less expensive than an average of ten doctor visits, a two-day hospital stay, a lactation specialist, an epidural, and the eighteen years of formula, food, clothes, school events, and housing that follow it.

Back to privacy. Because as you will recall, Roe v Wade was a 7-2 decision regarding the 14th Amendment, the clause of due process, and privacy. Please go to the comments and tell me the number of occasions you go to the doctor where it is everybody's business. It should also be noted that this decision was sent down at a time where women were being reported in the newspaper as "Mrs. (husband's name)," and not "Mrs. (woman's name)." I am not much of a "this is a slippery slope" person, but who is to say that this will not lead to the Supreme Court thinking it is okay that vigilantes are looking under bathroom stalls to ensure trans people are "using the correct bathroom?" 

Ask yourself if due process is different than it was fifty years ago. Roe was based on a married woman who already had two kids. It was not based in what I hear described by the bigoted extremist Republicans I mention earlier. They are picturing a woman of color with three babies on her hip, ratty hair, no job, and just milking the welfare system. They are picturing the "they" to whom they refer, instead of understanding that people who get abortions are...you know...people.

Finally, look at the economic impact. People who like to say that there are so many families who want to adopt do not look at the fact that an unwanted pregnancy turns into a given-up child. Again, many women having abortions are married with other kids. Or they are kids themselves. Or they are single adults. It does not matter who they are, because ultimately, they are not you. But if you are a woman, this decision being overturned will affect you as well.

When Roe v Wade was decided, one parent could sell shoes full time and afford to buy a house and feed his family on that money. Now, two salaries are often not enough to buy a house, feed everyone, or pay all of the bills. With abortion not being an option, it means pregnant women may not be able to afford prenatal care, mental health care, adoption counseling, parenting classes, vitamins, healthier food for the fetus to grow properly, air filters, water filters, food for the other kids in the house, disposable diapers, gasoline, 

So, here comes an unwanted baby from an unwanted pregnancy. This can only go a few ways, so allow me to lay them out for you. 1) Everything will be fine! 2) The family will manage. And by "manage," I mean there will possibly be divorce, the kids will make it to high school graduation, and everyone will need years of therapy to undo all of the stress-management techniques they learned incorrectly. 3) The family will have to rely on the social services Republicans hate, just to manage, and they will not be readily available in the areas where these people live, and everyone's taxes go up in order to pay for these services. 4) (and this is most likely) Long-term, the life-expectancy of both the mother and the child will be shorter, the education system suffers, the healthcare system suffers, and the mental-health system suffers. The only people who win are attorneys and funeral directors.

I would like to live in a world where everyone wins. But, if I have to lower my bar just a bit, I want to live in a world where I can walk into a doctor's office in peace. After all, that is liberty. I want to be able to get an abortion if I were to get pregnant today (I was told yesterday that I have viable follicles), because I will not be having a baby at 47 years old. That is life. My life. I also know that if I were to get pregnant today, and I had no option to get rid of it, I would be pretty much driven to suicidal thoughts. I am not being flippant. I am very, very fortunate to have a good enough job where I could seek help if that ever happened. That is the pursuit of happiness.

Dear Extremist Republicans:  quit pandering to your base, and try to save the life of your fucking wife while you save your own.

What Happened To Us?

 Hello! I really don't bust this thing out too often, but I have been thinking about the Supreme Court for a week now, and I feel this is the only way I can organize my thoughts a bit better.

First, though, this was originally a knitting blog so I would like to share my new shawl pattern with you. It is easy enough lace where you can try it as a second- or third lace project, and probably not lose your mind. It is also a pretty relaxing pattern, so the f-word should not come flying out of your mouth too often.

Here is the link to it: https://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/choir-shawl

And here are a couple of photos, if you are not a knitter and want to talk your knitter-friend into making you something for those breezy days of autumn and spring:

Okay so enough of that. Here is my problem.

When Ginsburg was confirmed, the Senate confirmation vote was 96-3, and 41 of those votes were Republican.

This week, various media outlets were reporting that the Senate "had the votes" to confirm a new justice to the Supreme Court before the presidential election in November.

What does that mean, exactly?

Amy Coney Barrett has not had her job interview yet, and the panel is already giving her the thumbs-up. While I think it is clear that I am neither a Supreme Court Justice or a Senator, I have questions about this. Most importantly, I think, is how one can argue that the majority of Senators will vote "yes" for her confirmation based her their political party. 

I don't give a hoot if she is anti-abortion. Everyone on the planet, especially people who are pro-choice, are anti-abortion. Nobody wants to make that decision. At all. Ever. Nobody. But knowing that I can talk to my doctor about it in private, without fear of either of us being prosecuted if I need to take that next step and abort a fetus is a bit of a relief. I am 100% anti-abortion; if I were pregnant right now, I would have to abort the fetus or face such dire mental consequences that I could not go on with my life. This includes carrying it to term for adoption or surrogacy. I am positive I could not go through with it and come out okay on the other side, no matter how much therapy or prayer I involved in my daily life. I know this. But I also know that, medically, aborting a fetus is not "killing a baby." Watch your words:  when cops shoot at someone, is it murder? When a woman finally ends years of abuse by fighting to almost her last breath and shooting her abusive spouse in the end, is it murder? When a guy tries to steal your car at the gas station and you refuse to get out of the car, so he shoots you and takes your car anyway, is it murder? When you have a medical procedure to clear out cells in your uterus that will drive you to suicide if you don't do this (and every woman will in fact spend at least two seconds exploring other options), is it murder?

Everyone is anti-abortion. But if a woman has one, it is none of my business at all. Just like it is none of my business if they go to a doctor for a drug addiction and seek treatment for it.

I don't care if Amy Coney Barrett is anti-abortion. I care if she will consider using any precedents already set, and interpreting clauses in the constitution that exist (like due process, for instance, and the amendment which states the government can't have a hand in establishing religion), when she hears cases relating to abortion.

If she is going into these hearings already "having the votes," does that mean that she has had such a stellar record that it is obvious to all other lawmakers that upholding the constitution and its original intentions are her intention? Or does it just mean that 51 people out of 100 will be voting "yes" for her because of their political party?

There has been a two-party system in this country for a long, long time. Each party has their own set of extremist talking-heads and talking-memes now (think Breitbart on the right and Occupy Democrats on the left) where there is one teeny piece of truth buried in a giant cloud of overblown crap to get people to feel a certain way, and consequently vote a certain way. It was not always this extreme, and nobody can seem to remember life before this ideology.

I was in college when Ginsburg was confirmed, and if you recall, the press conference where Clinton announced her nomination in the Rose Garden was met by exactly one question (Brit Hume) and zero answers. It was because the question was regarding Clinton's selection process and not Ginsburg's qualifications. Clinton shut it down, walking away from the podium with an entire press corps' worth of hands in the air. Looking back, love him or hate him (and even his most staunch supporters thought Bill was smarmy), it was a feminist move for the ages.

What happened to us? Why is it that, almost thirty years later, high-ranking politicians can only vote their party?

And as long as I am on the subject of philosophy, riddle me this one:  what is so intimidating about being liberal? I am a former Republican, currently without party because I now have to spend my whole life fact-checking other people's internet crap before forming an opinion on it. But you can be socially liberal and fiscally conservative at the same time. For instance, did women having their own credit cards cause the ridiculous debt problem we are facing now? Of course not...predatory lenders are not female-prey exclusive. Did women getting protection from employment termination due to pregnancy cause the morals in this country to sink? Of course not. 

But do you know what it did do? It helped the economy. It gave women their own buying power. Just like gay marriage becoming law in this country made the wedding industry explode in ways it previously had not. Giving people equal rights and access to knowledge gives them power, money, and a voice.

So the only reason someone would be opposed to "liberal" ideas...meaning everyone has certain basic rights...is if either they do not realize how much less it would cost them in the long run, or they are just closed-minded jerks who thinks human lives do not have equal value.

If you give money to a GoFundMe because a kid (or adult, for that matter) has cancer and can't afford their medical bills, but you think socialized healthcare is evil, ask yourself where you think your GoFundMe money would go if socialized healthcare was introduced.

If you stand outside a Planned Parenthood with an "Abortion Kills" sign for eight hours, looking women in the eye as they go into a clinic for everything from pap smears to prenatal care to abortions to breast exams to cyst monitoring, ask yourself what people see in you when you are in line at the grocery store, buying a six-pack of beer and a box of condoms. Is it possible you already have enough dish soap and food at the house? Of course. But that is not what people see, and your true actions are none of their business. Just like a woman walking into Planned Parenthood is none of your business.

If you were in support of "Whites Only" signs in the 50's and 60's, but you also retort Black Lives Matter with "All lives matter!", is it possible you only mean Republican lives? Your personal life? People's lives above the poverty line? Christian lives? White lives?

Because that is my current concern with the Supreme Court. I want to know why it is news that there is going to be a 6-3 conservative majority when politics should not have that big of a hand in interpreting the Constitution. Unless, of course, you are "liberal" and actually believe that life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness should include literally everyone born in this country. But as a lifelong Catholic, I can say with conviction that until our current pope was elected and started using social media to get his Word across, even they did not preach like all lives were equal. They are starting to.

It is an irony of historic proportions when the Catholic church is making humanitarian progress and the Supreme Court, or our three branches of government in general, are not. Please do me a favor:  break up with your political party for the next few weeks or months. Ask yourself if the person in your area running for office is has the best interest of as many constituents as possible in mind, no matter their ticket.

Call your Senators and be sure they are voting based on Barrett's interpretation of the constitution, and not because of their political party.

Look in the mirror and ask yourself if you can do better. Most of us can. Let's all try.

The Kaspar Party

Good morning! First, the good stuff. Have you been to Unraveled yet? It's the local yarn shop in Wauconda that is basically run by a human think tank with ADHD (that's a compliment). You should stop in and buy yarn from there.

http://www.examiner.com/article/troubles-get-unraveled-at-a-yarn-shop-wauconda?cid=db_articles

Also, Loopy Yarns in the south loop has now changed hands, and it is called Yarnify! The new owner is hosting a contest for a new logo, and it is open to absolutely anyone who is feeling a bit creative. The worst that can happen is that you don't win, but are introduced to the new shop. The best that can happen is that your logo is used, and you win a hundred-dollar prize!

http://www.examiner.com/article/south-loop-yarn-shop-is-holding-a-logo-design-contest?no_cache=1443181335

After long, careful thought, I have decided to start my own political party. It is sort of a mashup of the values of a Democrat and Libertarian, with the fiscal mind of a Republican. I am calling it the Kaspar party.

Yes, it sounds funny and does not mean much, but it is my last name and I can't think of anything better. And, spoiler alert:  my ideas are pretty naive, so the rest of this post will read like an eighth-grade school project.

When did our two main political parties require us to either vote our conscience, or vote our wallet, but not the possibility of both? Listening to some of the crap coming out of people's mouths make me want to just try my hand at running things better than these people. I know it would never happen, but here is what I have going for me:  I am honest, and I am good with numbers. Oh...and I care about people.

See, Bernie Sanders...arguably, the Democratic candidate doing the most talking...is one big sound byte, "Pope Francis has forcefully reminded us that greed, and the worship of money, is not what human existence should be about." Agreed, Bernie! This is one of about sixty quotes I have seen floating around that are attributed to the Vermont politician. What he fails to address, however, is how we are to pay for human existence. Why can't we do it without "money worship?"

And the Republican party...don't even get me started. So, Ben Carson, you don't think a Muslim should be president while the "purist" nutjobs in your party think that Obama is a Muslim as it is? Well, two things come to mind:  first, there are degrees of the religion of Islam, just like there are degrees of Christianity or any other religious sector. Of course I do not want a misogynist homophobic tyrant running things, but that's an extremist view of the Islamic religion. And secondly...on that note...Obama, a Muslim? Well, using the definition the Republican party would like us to see as "typical," Obama would be just about the worst Muslim on the planet, what with his equal-rights, ham-eating-during-high-holiday, socialist healthcare...

Here's what I want. I want a candidate to take the mic. I want him or her to say, "This country is a very complicated machine. There are a lot of working parts, but only a limited amount of funds. I have looked at all of the programs where we are pissing our money away (if Chris Christie can use the words he uses, "pissing" is allowed), and have decided to shut those suckers down and allocate the money to these programs here." (points to white-board with a laser pointer) "The subsidized housing program, commonly referred to as Section 8, has exposed a gap between the poverty line and the middle class. Someone making $18,000 per year is eligible for a voucher, but someone making $18,005 is not. That person will go from receiving $1,043 in housing assistance to zero. Here is how I plan on rectifying that, for anyone making between $18,001 and $26,000 per year." (moves laser pointer to other white-board) "If we cut the Consumer Confidence ad campaigns for the cotton and pork industries by 80%, this will leave us money to introduce a sliding scale to encourage people to get higher-paying jobs, but not fear losing their voucher, thereby keeping people in the workforce and not costing taxpayers extra money. Then, we can..."

And so on.

I read somewhere that Walker dropped out of the race because he couldn't manage his $900 million budget campaign, or something. Whoa. What could this country have done with $900 million from private donors? Oh, and before you blow the whistle on the Republican party for that, you will have to show me that Sanders, and Clinton, and any candidate on the other side of the ballot is campaigning with no outside funds. Don't tell me that this is a rich-people issue.

Herein lies the problem. If you are wealthy enough to donate millions to a candidate you "believe" in, then you can donate that money to a tangible cause you believe in as well.

The Kaspar party will be a numbers-driven, fiscally responsible party that will encourage people to vote their conscience and their wallet at the same time. Oh...you are pro-life so you want to defund Planned Parenthood? Okay then. I need two things from you, though...show me where that money is now going, and show me where people who used Planned Parenthood can go now, even if you are outlining what will happen to the babies that will be born because you (the candidate) do not actually believe abortion is legal, and therefore need an out for the end-result of an unwanted pregnancy. And I don't mean a general statement. Show me. With numbers. And names. Get people to sign HIPPA waivers so you can talk about their medical histories in public. I bet many women would be happy to give it to you. Maybe then, I will believe you.

Show me where my money is going, so I can determine if my heart is also protected in the transaction.

Who's in?

Attention Walmart Shoppers...

Good morning, and a Happy Thanksgiving to you all! I am not shy about my political views; I am a fiscal republican with what I consider a pretty big heart, so sometimes it is difficult to balance the capitalist in me with the giver in me. That said, I do not feel people should just get something for nothing. It is what it is, and of course you are welcome to feel your own way, disagree with me, and call me a name or two.

When I was a kid, I remember having a Barbie Dream House and both Andrea and Kristen drooling over it. I remember boxes and paper absolutely everywhere. I remember making cookies, year in and year out, at Mom's house. I remember carrying my Cabbage Patch Kid into my cousin's house in Bolingbrook and everybody oohing and ahhing over it.

My point is that the positive feelings associated with Christmas was more because those things were mine and the day surrounding them, and less because of the moment I received them. Now, I was recently at a birthday party for a five-year-old, and when he opened one of his gifts, he started running from the living room to the playroom and back, yelling, "I'M FREAKING OOOOUUUTTTTTT!" It was hilarious. I just don't know if the lasting impression will be the yelling and running, or playing with the toy afterward.

And it could have been any toy. Or game. Or article of cute clothing. The lasting effect on kids is the entire day, and not that one gift that they open and lose their minds over.

I say this today because, up until June of this year, I managed a retail outlet overnight for the largest company of its kind on the planet. Last year, on Black Friday, I was in the middle of my rotation and had to leave Thanksgiving dinner at Mom's house to go to Walmart. My first job of the night was to be backup for our Asset Protection manager, so I was directing traffic in the parking lot. "Excuse me!" I yelled. "This is a fire lane, so sorry!" I got "Fuck you...everyone else is parked here!" Okay then.

After that, I went inside to help control the flow of the lines. Every register had a cashier on it, but our fire code allowed for (if I recall) 33 people per register in the store at a time. Think about this for a second, and picture how close together the registers are, and how everyone wants to get checked out all at once. People were in line for three hours, barely moving for the majority of that time. Meanwhile, the person you claim does not make enough money to survive without food stamps (not true, by the way...most of these kids are either supplementing their income, or they know what they are getting into when they take the job...that is THEIR choice and not Walmart's...I also had hourlies that made forty grand a year) is getting harassed by one person at a time, plus the two or three people behind them in line within ear shot of the cashier.

I was in the middle of a swarm of people with shopping carts who were threatening each other, and they started to threaten me and my safety if I did not take care of things. This is a mob mentality I have trouble understanding. I actually did something I do not often do...I put on my Mom hat, and I told these people I would take care of things the best I could, but that they had to shut up and cooperate or they could leave their full shopping carts where they were and I would be happy to show them the door.

Then, later, I had eleven customers at the door of my office (the capacity of the office was three, maybe four if someone was in a dispute and you were willing to stand instead of sit). Apparently, one of the associates gave out tickets for a Playstation before the right time, so customers were threatening my job and my safety again unless I could do something for them. I took down all of their names and phone numbers, talked to our Electronics manager later that evening, called each and every one of them back the next day, and offered for them to buy the product online and I would refund them the difference. After a night's sleep (on their end) and their mob-mentality hangover wearing off, they were fine with that and they thanked me for my help.

But not that night. It was all about blood and anonymity that night.

So I ask you to consider a few things on this Thanksgiving, which now has the greatest commercial misnomer EVER, "Black Friday":

1. Do you remember Thanksgivings of days past as being a beautiful day of family, football, food, and togetherness? If your answer is "yes," then stay home and shop tomorrow. Your kids will be pleased with whatever they receive for Christmas.
2. Retailers (not just Walmart...all of them) have made it difficult to afford Christmas without missing Thanksgiving. Are you willing to do that? Are you willing to sacrifice family time to get hot under the collar with a thousand people fighting over the last Wii, or would you rather make the holiday yours and just afford what you can, so you can focus on love instead of money?
3. Do you honestly believe that your kids will grow up resenting you if you get them a smaller tablet for Christmas than what they wanted?
4. If you do venture out, can you please take a breath now and again and remind yourself that the people waiting on you are also missing their holiday, not so they can buy things for their kids, but so you can buy them for yours.

I do not normally bleed my heart out for anybody...I love to make money, and sometimes you have to take advantage of people to do that. But there are so few togetherness-themed times in our lives that are left; cars have DVD players so kids no longer play the alphabet game with their parents on road trips. We miss little moments because we are so busy documenting crap on facebook that we do not look up in time to see the next thing that happens. We go to little league games where no score is kept because heaven forbid a kid get their feelings hurt for losing, so we no longer have the chance to comfort our kids and help them get strong enough on their own two feet to accept the fact that life goes on after defeat.

So if you would rather get a good deal on a new TV instead of sit at home and laugh with your family, I respect your decision. But the people you encounter are either other stressed out shoppers just like you, or they are retail workers who are doing their best to get you the hell our of their store in peace so they can put things back where they belong when you are gone. They appreciate your business, but each of them will have thirty people asking them questions and complaining all at once, and quite frankly, none of them get paid enough to prioritize like that. 

I did. I made well over seventy grand a year there. But the hourly employees are there strictly to help you find what you need, and make your shopping experience pleasant. If you are miserable, ask yourself if it is because of something at the store, or if it is because you chose to go out into the swarm. I am not blaming anyone for holiday shopping. All I'm saying is that perhaps...maybe...you brought on some of that stress yourself. Retailers' jobs as a company are to entice you. If you fall prey to it over being with your family, that is on you. Not them.

Happy Thanksgiving to you. And ask for a manager if you need one.