Thank God June Is Almost Over

Good evening, friends...I must say that while I am a big fan of my three on, three off schedule, this month has exposed just how exhausting an extra day can be.  I'm tired.  And I've done nothing of personal value.  Even things like grocery shopping have gone by the wayside.  Sheesh.

But it's pretty much over...I can look forward to July and my vacation during the week of my birthday, among other things.  Right now, the husband is out of town and the dogs, cat, and I are preparing important secret documents which will be used to rule the world.

Okay...so back to knitting.  The one sock I've knitted is about 90% done, and it's large.  Very large.  I made it to the biggest pattern size on the ball band, figuring there was enough yarn for it and I could just decide who gets the pair if they turn out okay.  I have the correct gauge and yet I still think this particular sock will be too large for...say...me.  And that there will not be enough yarn left over for the second sock.  But then I had this ridiculous brainstorm.

I have a friend named Michael...after his third motorcycle accident left him struggling to save his leg a year later, he has found God, found happiness and peace, and has this ridiculously large piece of hardware on his left leg.  I, believe it or not, will have a spare sock to donate.  He wears a flipflop every day, but my guess is that there are occasions...even when it's ninety degrees outside...where one sock is necessary.  So as I finish this sock, I am doing it with him in mind, and with the hope that he will feel the love that went into every stitch.  There is even personal love in the toe part, since that's what I have left!  Win.


July's scarf is complete, the pattern is almost complete (I don't know why I have let the business of work spill THAT much into everything, but whatever), and next month's pattern is already started.  Still ahead!  That is a victory!


With my vacation in July, I'm hoping to get so far ahead that I will be able to start a project I've had in my mind for about eight months now...if I can do it correctly, I could really open a door of opportunity with this whole knitting thing.  It would be a sort of perfect combo of the three things I adore the most:  yarn, living beings, and math.


For now, though, here is the pattern from June, finally made public today:


https://www.etsy.com/listing/103269229/the-draw-rugby-scarf-knitting-pattern


It's kind of a schizophrenic rugby scarf.  I'm a fan of it...ooh!  And it uses sport-weight yarn!  This is the time of year that sport weight goes on sale because LYSs are making room for the gushy fall stuff.  It's a very easy pattern, it comes with a chart AND written instructions, and the yarn gives it a bit of sheen.  Personally, I think if you're a knit-and-purl knitter and you have a spouse who owns a trenchcoat, this would be a great gift because it's the perfect trenchcoat accessory.  Just my humble opinion.


I used Cascade Venezia Sport.  Heavenly.  My boss smelled it (yes, she smells fibers...her passion is sewing and designing, so she's all about the fabric) and gave me her version of a thumbs-up.


Well, it's time for bed.  Thank you for reading...my column will be back in full force in July.  I think I only wrote four or five articles this month, but that will change now that the big work thing is behind me.

Must Be Monday

So here I am, sitting on my kitchen counter while the fridge guy gropes all of the electronics that supposedly keep my food cold.  The weather is too nice for this crap...all it means is that I have to ride my bike to my old house later, instead of taking the car, which was the original plan.

Seriously.  Seventy degrees and sunny.

Anyway, next week is World Wide Knit In Public Day (yes...I said "week" and "day" like they are the same), so this week's article is a summary of all of the events in the Chicago area.  Tell your friends!  Or...you know...just tell one friend, and hopefully they will tell another one:

http://www.examiner.com/article/world-wide-knit-public-day-events-the-chicago-area

And in my advanced, proactive fashion, I learned how to schedule email deliveries in Febraury so I have been using my mad skillz to send out the Scarf Pattern of the Month on the first day of the month if I'm working that day.  Well, I did it twice.  And it worked once.  And then yesterday morning, I got a "cannot be delivered" message from Google.  So yeah...I was late this month, all because I didn't bother to verify that the email had been sent.

The good news...if you were looking for some...is that this month, I have two patterns written and I am trying to decide which one to use for July.  Not a bad problem to have!  I may just knit both samples and see which one I like better.  The problem, of course, is that if both of them turn out to be badly mangled balls of yarn, I have now lost the month and will also have to go back to the drawing board.  But seriously...I'm feeling lucky!  One  of them (and these are the two that are FULLY written...there is another one on the burner that's partially written) is lacy and mossy, and the other one is lacy and holey but not in a lace-hole way.  So we'll see.

In other news, I am watching my life flash before my very eyes.  I certainly don't think I am about to die, but I look back at the last few years and think, "What the f$%k just happened?"  And it's everything...not one event in particular, but there has been way too much change.  I don't know why this sort of thing hits me every few months, but when it does, I just want to cry and run around like a little kid.

Then, I watch the fridge guy struggle with yanking my refrigerator out of its teeny weeny space, and I remember that my problems can be way larger than worrying about what pattern I should knit next.  This guy gets paid to...you know...yank my refrigerator out of its teeny weeny space.  Through no fault of his own, he is unable to do it.  He is unable to do the very job he is here to do.  I just tried helping him roll the sucker...of course completely full of both food and ice...onto this plastic sheet.  No such luck or skill.

I think I'm going to knit the lacy and mossy one first.

Is The Day Beginning Or Ending?

Good morning, everyone...I've been pretty mopey this month until about three days ago, when I realized I have things like deadlines that need to be kept.  And I should really bathe the dogs.

Anyway, June is a huge knitting month in Chicago.  Huge.  The only month that may be bigger is August.  So hopefully I'll be getting off my butt to write more about knitting.  We have World Wide Knit In Pubilc Day (well, week) coming up, the Midwest Fiber and Folk Art Fair, sales all over the local yarn shop world...it will basically be a very fun month to at least shop for yarn, even if it ends up being too hot to knit without air conditioning.

June's pattern is pretty well ready to be sent out to the Scarf of the Month subscribers, and I have about four ideas for July.  I should probably pick one, and go with it...

I'm open to suggestions.  One of them uses ribbon yarn and increases, one uses laceweight yarn, one uses twisted stitches, and they will probably all be released at some point throughout the year.  For now, though, I'm open to suggestions.  Anyone have a vote on which is the next scarf pattern you want to see?  Oh, speaking of which...I also published the blog post about making the knitting pins on Ravelry.  Why should my teeny weeny circle of readers be the only ones who can do something with ten yards of yarn?

http://thefiberfriend.blogspot.com/2011/12/two-more-days-before-road-trip-time.html

By the way, today's Knit Tips Tuesday is about yarnovers.  Because sometimes, you actually want to make them on PURPOSE (as opposed to me, who yarns over on pretty much every knit-to-purl change in the middle of a row):

http://www.examiner.com/article/knit-tips-tuesday-yarnovers-1

Goodness...I should probably start my day.  I have zero words of wisdom today...just wanted to say hello to my knitting friends and family.  Oh, and go see "The Avengers."  Two hours of both Chris Evans AND Chris Hemsworth?  Sign me up!  Have a good day, everybody.

Knit Purl Knit Purl Knit Purl...

So here I am, groggy and exhausted from working too many hours and then getting a call at four in the morning (he's forgiven...I knew the call was coming but what makes me angry is that I was already awake), and of course not going back to sleep and waking back up at nine or so. that would have been ideal.  But whatever.

Nothing a spot of green tea can't fix.

So I took a hiatus from life last week, and today's Knit Tips Tuesday is about working with double-pointed needles.  Sometimes I curse them, and other times I adore them...it really depends on the day.  I guess it boils down to how fiddly I'm feeling; while I can sing like an angel, I can also fuck up with the best of them and slide pretty things right off of a pair of double-pointed needles.

Here is the article:

http://www.examiner.com/article/knit-tips-tuesday-double-pointed-needles?cid=db_articles

And then, I listed my May Scarf Pattern of the Month on Etsy.  It's named after a town in France, since it's sort of a French-girl scarf.  The feedback has been positive so far, including from our friends at Knitting Fever, who manufacture and distribute Sublime Yarns:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/100391299/lille-scarf-knitting-pattern

So there you go.  Today, I will be formatting June's pattern, drinking more green tea and eating bits of food my body can actually play with and digest (as opposed to chocolate sugar cookies, which was what my diet mostly consisted of yesterday), and maybe clip a coupon or two and save some cash at the grocery store.  I should also make an effort to try and finish the sample of the June scarf, even though the pattern is done, the blocking is half done, the yarn is still gorgeous...

Or I'll take a nap.  I'm not feeling very motivated.

But hey...the bright side is that I wrote an article, I posted a pattern for sale, I got in my car and drove across the county line for cheaper sales tax on hot water, and I have short-term ambition.  Maybe today will be lovely after all!

And finally, for those of you who  missed the photo of Bluto proving he is the most useless of all pit bulls, completely incapable of mauling joggers even if they were wearing Lady Gaga's meat dress, here is the proof.  By the way, we just looked over and saw him this way...it's not as if we staged the pillows on him:

Have a good day!  Make like Bluto.  Pile yourself between a bunch of pillows as if you are the creme filling of an Oreo cookie.

That Damn Sock

Good morning, everyone!  I've been on a bit of a hiatus from pretty much everything, but I think I'm finally snapping out of it.  Tonight, I'm going to outline the next few articles for Examiner.com, and I've actually accomplished a ton over the past week or so.

Yesterday, I went on my second bike ride of the year, and I'm paying for it today.  See, I don't know if all of you are like me, but that phrase "It's just like riding a bike" can be taken so literally that your rational self just completely tunes out.  Example:  last year, in Texas, I rode my bike all of twice because I was too afraid to ride down the streets of Katy without dying.  While I did make an effort to walk everywhere, as I have done since I moved back as well, walking and riding use different sets of muscles.

Last week, I got on the bike for the first time this year; every time I tried to ride previously, it was either raining sideways, raining cats and dogs (no wind but a blinding amount of water), or it was fifty and so windy that even MY hair was blowing.  I rode to Oak Park last week...it's about eight and a half miles.  Felt glorious.  Knitted all day.  Rode home.  Still felt glorious.

Yesterday, I was convinced that the one round-tripper from last week got me into shape, so I rode to Deerfield  and back.  Deerfield is about fourteen miles away, through some moderate hills, and I was into a twenty-mile-per-hour wind.  Duh.  So today, I feel like I was riding with a four-year-old on my shoulders, and instead of a Raleigh Cadent 5.0 '06, I was actually riding a plastic Big Wheel.  Live and learn.

I have two projects in my bag at the moment.  The first one is the sample for the June Scarf Pattern of the Month.  The pattern has been done for quite a while, but the sample still needs to be completed...even though I know the math works, and the pattern has no mistakes, I have to actually finish and block the sample.  So there.  The other project...shame on me...is that damn sock.

From what I understand, socks come in pairs.  You have to finish one, and then you have to finish another one, and THEN you have a finished project.  This is the precise reason I like to knit little instant-gratification wonders, and why I choose unique seamless garments over complicated ones.  If I bind off, I have completed a project.  So if I finish...say...a sleeve, I am damn-well convinced I'm done.

This sock would be part of a first-ever pair of socks, if I actually complete it.  It has been on the needles since probably December or January.  I should have started my sock adventure with toe-up, two-at-a-time socks, so I could complete the pair all at once.  But NOOOOOO...

I still have my kimono sweater that I bust out every week or so, but it's just miles and miles of stockinette stitch at this point...it's what you do when you're waiting for the pre-empt of the president's speech to finish so you can get back to watching Days of our Lives.

Right now, I'm on a string of four days off because I was owed a day from two weeks ago, when I covered for my counterpart as she was still on vacation.  I did a fair amount of knitting yesterday, and riding, and I clipped all of my coupons (I'm not a mad Shelf Clearing Rebate Accumulating Nutcase, but I do like saving money so I can live better), and I wrote a letter to my tenants with an outline of their new rent.  Today's plan involves almost finishing the sample (I won't finish it, but I can probably get close).  Maybe...just maybe...I will also bust out that damn sock.  To harbor any guilt I feel for needing my size 3 double-points for any other project, I knit about two needles' worth per week.  Sometimes more.  By about 2015, I should have a completed pair of maiden-voyage socks.

For now, I hope everyone has a good and productive day!

Call In Well Instead of Sick

Good morning!  Where have I been, you ask?  Nowhere.  The following are all true statements as to what I have done since my last post:

1.  Started and nearly finished a prayer shawl for a friend with cancer (that damn crocheted edging is KILLING me...what was I thinking?).
2.  Convinced the government I was worthy of a grant to the tune of seven grand, all because I run a failing business.
3.  Listen to a god-fearing woman tell me I should avoid porn and leave my baggage packed up.
4.  Posted a teaser-photo, only to get a great compliment from the company that makes the yarn in the photo.
5.  Re-lived the moment in "The Blues Brothers" when Jake and Elwood decided to get the band back together.

Yes, some of those items are out of context, but word-for-word, they are all true.

My employer (who I very rarely mention by name) is a big supporter of the Children's Miracle Network, and the local hospital for which they raise money is the current Children's Memorial Hospital.  On the first weekend of June, the hospital is relocating and becoming the Ann and Robert H. Lurie Children's Hospital.  This made me realize one and only one thing:  I want to be important enough...and rich enough to make a large grant...for a children's hospital to be named after me.

St. Jude was started because Danny Thomas was failing in Hollywood, and prayed to St. Jude (the patron saint of hopeless cases) that if he had great success, he would build a shrine in his name.  How's THAT for delivering on a promise?

Anyway, I am going to be walking for Children's Miracle Network during our fundraising period, in an unconventional way.  I'm going to be walking on a treadmill at the front door, greeting customers and putting a tip jar in front of me for customers to donate to the cause.  Yes, I'll go nowhere fast, but BOY will it be worth it.  I may have to find a job-approved way of getting the date and location into the paper (well, the internet) so people can come and donate.

On the knitting front, stay tuned for an article later today.  Last month, I had over two thousand hits on my page...I wrote an article about what to knit for your teen, and three major yarn companies retweeted it to their followers.  The article had 56 likes on facebook.  Obviously, this isn't going to get me my millions to open that hospital, but it could be the start of something bigger, no?

I already have the pattern ready for June, and I have to finish knitting the sample but Tiny E and I have not found an error in the pattern.  Here is a teaser for the pattern in May...it's the only one I'm releasing to those who did not subscribe to the series:

Also, I have been feeling a bit discombobulated for the last month, so I decided that it's time to get organized.  The bottom fell out when I realized my car insurance bill was going to be late (as if that's the end of the world, but if you know me, you know what a big deal that is).  So this may include organizing my yarn stash, cleaning, putting things away, throwing things out, and even alphabetizing.  But the breaks will involve knitting my current projects; my goal is to have only two projects on needles by the time I am finished.

Stop laughing.  Nothing is wrong with shooting big and missing.  Be well!

Still Too Cold for the Bike

So here I am, having coffee in Deerfield and visiting a friend, when I realized I had to, HAD TO, finish an article I've been thinking about for four weeks or so.  Turns out I have a faithful reader in California who is a newer back-to-knitting knitter, and she wanted to know what she could knit for her teen.  I consulted the local experts, who were more than happy to provide suggestions:

http://www.examiner.com/knitting-in-chicago/chicago-area-experts-weigh-on-what-to-knit-for-your-teen

And for those who don't know me, yes that's me in the photo.  I couldn't find a stock photo of an angst-ridden teen wearing anything knitted.  I figured since I look like everygirl and my face is obscured, it wouldn't be so bad.  Then, I pulled up the article on the finished page (it looks different from the page where I actually write and edit the stuff) and realized I look like a cutting-edge, flaming-hot, ridiculous narcissist.  Luckily, I'm not one, as illustrated by the fact that I'm about 64.48% embarrassed.

Especially since I post the articles on all of the facebook pages, twitter profiles, etc. of anyone to whom I link in the article, and within an hour, over three dozen people have "liked" it on their facebook pages.  Oh well...too late to edit at this point.

It could be worse...I could have protruding ribs like a REAL model.  Or I could be Bluto, looking as angst-ridden as any teen when he wears the same scarf:

He has no idea hot awesome he looks in "lettuce."

Anyway, since I'm just waiting on my tax return, I've decided to put all chores and projects on hold and just knit until the cows come home.  That's not bad, right?  I also would just like to say thanks to the local yarn shops in Chicago...I understand that knitting is a niche-hobby.  My articles will never be read by hundreds of thousands because...well...I don't write the weather column.  But at the same time, those who DO read my articles and share my interest in knitting are some of the nicest, most well-rounded and interesting people I have ever met.  There is something to be said for going into a specialty store and knowing that not only do the associates not get paid commission, they care about you as a person as much as they care about your purchase.  While talking to the yarn store employees about what to knit for your teen, the ladies at Knitche were clamoring to show me what they were talking about regarding looking at the "cool kids" stores before choosing your pattern.  What fun!

And it was 29 degrees this morning when I left...perfectly lovely weather (especially since it's sunny, so by the middle of the day you feel the chill and heat at the same time), but I can't have my first bike ride of the year be in weather that wears out my lungs too quickly.  I need it above 55 degrees or so.  But once it's that warm, watch out, because the next step is figuring out how to knit and ride at the same time...